VISION AND REALITY

"And the parched ground shall become a pool." Isaiah 35:7

We always have visions, before a thing is made real. When we realize that although the vision is real, it is not real in us, then is the time that Satan comes in with his temptations, and we are apt to say it is no use to go on. Instead of the vision becoming real, there has come the valley of humiliation.


"Life is not as idle ore,
But iron dug from central gloom,
And batter'd by the shocks of doom
To shape and use."
God gives us the vision, then He takes us down to the valley to batter us into the shape of the vision, and it is in the valley that so many of us faint and give way. Every vision will be made real if we will have patience. Think of the enormous leisure of God! He is never in a hurry. We are always in such a frantic hurry. In the light of the glory of the vision we go forth to do things, but the vision is not real in us yet; and God has to take us into the valley, and put us through fires and floods to batter us into shape, until we get to the place where He can trust us with the veritable reality. Ever since we had the vision God has been at work, getting us into the shape of the ideal, and over and over again we escape from His hand and try to batter ourselves into our own shape.

The vision is not a castle in the air, but a vision of what God wants you to be. Let Him put you on His wheel and whirl you as He likes, and as sure as God is God and you are you, you will turn out exactly in accordance with the vision. Don't lose heart in the process. If you have ever had the vision of God, you may try as you like to be satisfied on a lower level, but God will never let you.

Oswald Chambers

Whoa!!

I was on a diet. I tried tucking my tummy in but it bounced right back like a balloon.
It’s the mango season right? So I packed some mangoes for desert but apparently this raised eyebrows. A work mate insisted I had a story to tell, but none that I was aware of. I hadn’t seen the moon though but I figured it was due to changes in the weather and stuff. Curious about the moon’s disappearance,I found the nearest clinic and asked for those little testers. The lady at the reception pointed me to another room in which I found 3 men stacking little parcels into boxes. They were excited to see me, then I felt embarrassed asking for the packets. I kept my hands in full view, to show off my rings, just in case they thought I was doing things illegally.

“Madam, you feel free, for us we are here. You tell us everything”.
That cracked me up.
They took great delight in explaining how to use the little gadget.
“Now Madam, it is simple. When you go to the bathroom, preferably early in the morning, you will put a sample of u…”
“Ok, ok I know what to do”
“Yes, then you wait for at least 3 minutes. When you see 2 lines, it is positive. One line means it is negative and then if you see this line only, it means it’s wrong - you try again”
I paid and I was out of there.
Next morning - I waited and saw “this line only, it means it’s wrong - you try again”
I tried again the next morning and WHOA!!!!!!!


I’m feeling pretty fine.
Any changes so far? Well, my waist line is rounder.

A week later
I’m swamped. I wish I could get some nap time but can’t do much of that in office. Little person is pattering and kicking and flipping and somersaulting. I have headaches from time to time but that is only when I haven’t eaten in a span of 30 minutes. Yeah I have to constantly nibble on something.
My nose is extremely sensitive to the slightest of scents. Each whiff makes single file entry into my nostrils. That means at one moment I can smell all the scents around me and tell the difference. I don’t know if I’m making sense but that is what it is - Agh! Which means, no perfumes for me and please keep your distance if you have one on.

I love all things bland right now, who knew sugarless tea could taste so good.
Rabbits would consider me a serious force to contend with, I nibble constantly – nuts, veggies, fruits, something needs to go down all the time.
I need to take time off work but can’t get round to that just yet,especially since I only begun work a month ago.
Frantically searching for a doctor who can handle my complications. Spoke to Ian Clarke, he referred me to his hospital doctor, so I will probably go to IHK on Saturday.

There. My long explanation for not running the marathon.

It's over, now what?

I woke up early and lay in bed, enjoying the warmth and debating on how soon after the alarm went off I should drag my legs onto the floor. When I finally dragged myself to the shower, I was almost wide awake. By the time I was ready to leave the house, it was 7:15, the marathon was scheduled to start at 7:30. I grabbed the first bodaboda and got to the starting point just in time to see the tail end of the multitudes that were stampeding and pushing in the name of running. So this time I wasn’t able to get good snap shots.
At around 7:50 I heard people shouting “he is back”, “cheer him on”. I thought that was just wrong, did the man take a short cut? Did he forget the route? The marathon had just began, how could someone be back so soon? What drug was he on? I put my ignorance aside and acknowledged that some people are road runners, the guy did make 10km in less than 26 minutes.
I love the mood stirred by marathons –a spirit of unity, solidarity, and purpose, the pickpockets and thieves notwithstanding. I was amazed at the numbers of people that trotted up and down the streets of Kampala in the name of preparation. They had a set goal and were united in achieving it. When the day arrived, acquaintances had been made, business cards exchanged, maybe even proposals. I wonder if this unity could seep into other activities like fighting corruption, injustice and poverty. What potent does a marathon hold to draw millions of East Africans? That street vendors and taxi drivers would gladly part with 6,000 shillings? May be they are happy to spend it on events they will execute personally not in mystery ventures like Aids and Malaria prevention.




I took pleasure watching people clock in, walking, limping, some even running with fresh enthusiasm. Standing at the side lines I saw friends, relatives, colleagues, schoolmates that I hadn’t seen in eons. That was enough to keep me smiling all morning, amazed at the effect life has had on them – some were smaller, larger (mostly larger), bolding, graying – aah! I smile again. There is something special about seeing old school mates later in life, especially those with whom I lost teeth, lisped with and discussed the amazing rats in our homes.

Advertising at its best.

Running the MTN marathon

I was eagerly anticipating the MTN marathon when one amazing event stopped me in my tracks. So, I let go of the baton but hope I will be there to cheer friends on.

Run the race my friends, put every hinderence aside and press on to that goal for which you run - health, fun, money, prestige... Do it with all your strength.

John the tea man

He is a short, well built, Musoga man. Very soft spoken, hardly says a word except when he is greeting. He is one of the first to arrive in office and probably the last to leave in the evening. When I met him 5 years ago, I was impressed with how neat he was, he kept his office clean. One of the few men that wears a T-shirt underneath his shirt. In most offices his job is handled by a woman, so that makes him unique. John is our tea man.

Every morning he washes the flasks, boils water in the heater and makes tea for an office of about 30 people. Whenever we have office meetings he will make special preparations – tea and snacks depending who is attending the meeting. He will also supervise the distribution of flowers for the offices. He has done this for over 6 years.
His profession is belittled but when he is off duty, his absence impacts us severely.
We start the day with a daily doze of coffee or hot cup of tea courtesy of John. But as selfish human beings, we are never keen to relate with colleagues at a lower level. We pose the question “what will it benefit me?”. We are often drawn to people we think will help us in one way or another, in the office it’s about getting a pay rise or a promotion.

Anyway, so it's nice to see John again. I stopped by the office one Saturday morning and found him supervising the cleaners. There was no better time to catch up - find out how he is doing. Our conversation went somewhat like this:

“So John, how are you?”

“I’m fine thanks, how are you?”

“I’m ok”

“How is the family?”

“Oh! It is in a mess”

I immediately thought, he’d had a disagreement with his wife and they were separated.

“What do you mean? What kind of mess?”

“My wife! My wife passed away on the 1st of January. She was pregnant. She died during child birth.”

My eyes begun to water.

Then he said, “my child died too, they all went”

I felt a huge lamp in my throat.

“John, I am so sorry!”

“Thank you. You see me here but honestly It’s just my body but my mind is far. I can’t stop blaming myself for what happened”.

Our conversation was interrupted. I picked it up a week later, I was curious to know why he blamed himself.
He said, while his wife was pregnant he had a dream about a dead baby. Looking back, he thinks it was a warning that he should have acted on - told his wife about -shared with someone.
Life is torture right now, with all the guilt on his back. We talked about it. I shared my experience and advised him to take it to the cross. I feel committed to pray for John and his little girl Praise who is four years old and constantly asking about her mother.

The grieving process is very lonely. Multitudes will flock your house when calamity strikes but they soon leave and you are left alone to purge the pain of every single day without your loved one. When the last soil is thrown on the grave, life resumes its impetus, people walk away and forget.
Always check on friends and colleagues , who are grieving, even months and years after the loss. Don’t be afraid to ask, don’t think you are opening old wounds, it’s actually their best therapy, to talk and share their feelings and to know that someone cares.

Robert the Cleaner

Robert is an energetic, hard working young man that I met 5 years ago. He is one of our office cleaners. Whenever we need an extra hand, Robert gladly chips in. He runs a thousand and one personal errands; paying electricity and water bills when staff can’t leave the office, he is sent for food, he cleans, he photocopies, and he prints, never complaining. Office would be lacking without him, he is a link in this chain without which, progress would come to a halt.

When I came home last year, I was pleasantly surprised to receive a call from him. He wanted to know how I was – amazing!
When I returned to work 2 weeks ago, with a glimmer in his eyes, he informed me that he is a senior 6 candidate. I was elated! He is in his early 30’s, he works 7am to 5 pm, as soon as he clocks out, he dashes to school for evening classes which end at 10pm – talk about resilience. I’m totally inspired by him.

Today is examination briefing for all senior 6 candidates. He took the day off, but I was surprised to see him rushing into office. He seemed a little unsettled, but I assumed he was tying up a few loose ends. Before heading out the door he said “I am going for briefing just now, but last night thugs broke into my house and stole everything”. I was speechless! Leaving me no time to commensurate, he smiled briefly and run out the door.
He has left a print on my life.

SHIFT

When I last posted about events in my life, I had a helper called Apolot. She has long since returned to her village in Atteta. Apolot and Mich were hissing, purring and barking at each other like cats and dogs. Having enough issues to contend with, this was not one to add to the number. She didn’t quite appreciate life in the city. When asked to clean the bathroom, she would stare at me as if to say, “ you’ve got to be kidding”. Her cleaning patterns were a little odd, she insisted on using a brush instead of a rug to mop and evidently the floor didn’t sparkle, in fact at times it looked worse. Thinking I was a little too particular I let her settle in. Out of a burning curiosity I asked about her cleaning strategy, and found out she had never cleaned a tiled floor before. She’d lived in a mud hut all her life. To clean a mud hut floor, all one needs is a local broom, do not make the mistake of using water , unless of course you are planning to create a mud puddle. For a new look, the floor is plastered with fresh mad or dung to smooth it over and then left to dry. So it’s possible that to Apolot, the tiles looked perfect the way they were.

One fine day, I came home to a resignation letter asking me to “be easy” – the “it’s not you, it’s me” story. I was somewhat glad that she had taken the initiative, we talked it over but when the time came for her to leave, she had second thoughts. Unfortunately I was already geared up to resume my duties; wake up at 5:30am, take a shower, get Mich ready, prepare breakfast , drop him off to school, get back home, clean, cook, have some alone time then pick Mich up and usually that was where my day begun or ended. I would listen to his stories, answer questions, engage in play and small arguments. Bath time, dinner, brush his teeth, read bed time stories…wakeup at 5:30am, take a shower and so on. By the way, Mich passed his P1 interview, yeee!!

I was gladly settling into a routine when I received a phone call from my former place of work. My supervisor asked me to begin work in a week. Whoa! That was going to be tricky without a helper. Panic!! I didn’t have a backup plan.
DAY 1 – Sam picked Mich, took him to grandma’s, I rushed home tired and that night we ate some leftovers.
DAY 2 – Sam picked Mich, took him to grandma’s, I rushed home tired, managed to whip up a meal.
DAY 3, 4 – Crazy weekend. Aunt’s introduction ceremony and search for a helper.
DAY 5 – Sam picked Mich and worked from home.
DAY 6 – Mom came up with a brilliant idea and viola! I have a helper. Thank God for moms. Hellen and Mich get along like a house on fire. By the way, I’ve been on cloud 9 since Mich begun to read on his own. It’s a wonderful feeling.

For 3 years now, I have been a house wife. I have enjoyed looking after my husband, loved watching my son grow. I carried out the duties of a stay home mom – cooking, cleaning, shopping – the works. That I have been blessed with a job in this fast paced Uganda is a blessing. That my former employer would have me back is an honor.
I give God thanks. In my next post I will tell about my challenges returning to work after being a stay home mom.