3 years ago God gave me a song, but not the stage to sing it on.
It said “You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains” - I was slipping further into the valley.
It said “You raise me up to walk on stormy seas” - I was drowning.
It said “You raise me up to more than I can be” that’s when I asked, “But God, what do you mean?”
Silence!
I figured I had misheard Him. I tucked the song away but each time I heard it play, it drew me to a familiar place. He was God anyway and I had no business creating a stage or selling tickets for my show.
Has God given you specifics but the details of your life are easily comparable to catching a cloud or sand sifting through your grip? Well that’s not new, been there. I have learned that our God is too big to fathom, His ways are way, way, up there and you and me are down below. He knows the end from the beginning and everything in between.
Keep walking, keep praying, keep trusting and you will be amazed at what God is doing. May be not now, actually many times, not now, but in Time, it will be made beautiful. Blessed are those who are patient for they will develop Character and Discipline and Self control. In case you haven’t realized, your life is not about you – tough huh?! Well, that fact becomes more palatable when you get with the program.
Three years down the road, I’m beginning to see how the lyrics of that song are playing out in my life. I stand in awe. I confess too that I had gone off on a tangent, when I first got the song; I imagined how it was all going to play out. I could see the stage, the instrumentalists, the backup team, but oh how off the mark! I look at it now and it’s an orchestra and there is a crowd of witnesses. If and when I take centre stage, I will not need to convince any one listening; they have seen and heard my voice in rehearsal. He makes all things beautiful in His time.
Remain accountable and...
Wait upon the Lord!
Ps. If this message strikes a chord with you, Amen! I just felt compelled to write it. If you have questions I'm happy to answer them too.
Sep 19, 2011
Sep 14, 2011
Coming up to breath!
So, I have been under, trying to get my bearings. I figure if I don’t come up now, I will be out longer than I would like.
We got here in one piece and I can confidently say Amani is my daughter - a chip off the old block. 5 years ago I hopped on a 17 hour plane ride with my 2 year old son who literally run riot. I was this close to disowning the toddler. I kept asking myself, “who is this kid?, where did he come from?” - he couldn’t sit still and he yelled his lungs out, I reached my wits end and in the same breath concluded those were not my genes.
For this plane ride I was bracing myself, keeping my fingers crossed and stuff. Amani sung, clapped her hands and promptly fell asleep. There were a few moments of discomfort but on the whole she was great! In my haste to make it to the airport and all the other issues that were crowding my mind, I forgot to pack her milk and snacks. Which mother does such crazy things? I’m guilty. But you know, she made it through on the funny meals on the plane, Bless God!
At some point I got into a panic thinking, “oh my gosh! She is going to wake up and scream the plane to the ground, then what will I do?’ But no! she was curious about the clouds and the plane wings. After 17 hours we were still good!
She literally stole the hearts of all the guys that met her, they smiled, carried her and she busked in it, she even attempted to follow one of them. What’s with baby girls and grown men? Her Dad is melting butter around her, it’s amazing. Mich, now 7 years old, was a fantastic big brother, he made sure Amani was entertained, he sat still, put on his seat belt and was glued to the movie screen.
We arrived at Dulles (read dallas) airport in Washington D.C.
It felt special to join the queue of US citizens and permanent residents. Castilo was about to finish his shift and we were the last in line. I presented our sealed envelops and passports to him, he verified the information, took our finger prints and showed us which door to walk through to pick our luggage.
Coming from Africa, it was only natural that we were directed to the queue with those whose luggage needed to be checked (Indians, Mexicans, Asians - get the drift?)- just incase we had brought in grasshoppers or something just as weird.
The mexican lady before us was asked 4 times if she had carried dried meat and 4 times she denied, her facial expressions implied that a) she had no idea what the officer was talking about and b) what ever it was, she didn't have it. Three officers surrounded her case and begun to ransack it and all they came up with was what looked like tamarind (sour berries/apedur) - they let her go.
Knowing that I hadn't carried any weird stuff, I said I didn't have anything to declare except my spices - Royco, curry, bla bla. The machine spotted something in my suitcase and the officer was all over me.
'Mom, what do you have in this suit case?"
" urr clothes, shoes ...",
"Mom, I'm going to have to check this case", meanwhile I couldn't for the life of me recall putting in anything out of the ordinary. He finally finds the "things" and asked, what are these? and I said "Paper bead necklaces"
Eh eh! life can be complicated!
The weather is great! I can’t imagine facing obscene summer temperatures with 2 kids who are adjusting to a new environment.
Mich is into his second week of school, yes, we hit the ground running, but so far so good. He is super excited to be here, he thinks Burger King and Mc Donald’s dropped from heaven (we’ve got to eat healthy my boy, remember we are back to the land of big words like calories and stuff).
I’m now a pro on “outside countries”! - everything seems mundane already, maybe because I spend my days applying for jobs. There is no maalo, although Mich cracked me up the other day when I found him staring at a huge furry cat sitting at a neighbors front door. He was clearly calculating which part would be safest to hold, so he could carry it away. To check the situation, I asked him what he was doing, he was so glad to see me,
he said “mummy please help me carry this cat home”,
I said “Mich, this cat probably belongs to these neighbors and I don’t think they would be pleased to find it gone”
he said “It’s a free cat, I asked all the people here if it belonged to them and they said no, so I can take it”.
I was tempted to burst out laughing but with the serious look on his face, it was clearly no laughing matter. We had a brief talk about animals and he seemed satisfied but only temporarily. The boy is into pets big time.
That’s about all for now, I’m still scatter brained at the moment, settling in a new country is major. There is a lot of information to read and keep abreast with but I will get going soon.
We got here in one piece and I can confidently say Amani is my daughter - a chip off the old block. 5 years ago I hopped on a 17 hour plane ride with my 2 year old son who literally run riot. I was this close to disowning the toddler. I kept asking myself, “who is this kid?, where did he come from?” - he couldn’t sit still and he yelled his lungs out, I reached my wits end and in the same breath concluded those were not my genes.
For this plane ride I was bracing myself, keeping my fingers crossed and stuff. Amani sung, clapped her hands and promptly fell asleep. There were a few moments of discomfort but on the whole she was great! In my haste to make it to the airport and all the other issues that were crowding my mind, I forgot to pack her milk and snacks. Which mother does such crazy things? I’m guilty. But you know, she made it through on the funny meals on the plane, Bless God!
At some point I got into a panic thinking, “oh my gosh! She is going to wake up and scream the plane to the ground, then what will I do?’ But no! she was curious about the clouds and the plane wings. After 17 hours we were still good!
She literally stole the hearts of all the guys that met her, they smiled, carried her and she busked in it, she even attempted to follow one of them. What’s with baby girls and grown men? Her Dad is melting butter around her, it’s amazing. Mich, now 7 years old, was a fantastic big brother, he made sure Amani was entertained, he sat still, put on his seat belt and was glued to the movie screen.
We arrived at Dulles (read dallas) airport in Washington D.C.
It felt special to join the queue of US citizens and permanent residents. Castilo was about to finish his shift and we were the last in line. I presented our sealed envelops and passports to him, he verified the information, took our finger prints and showed us which door to walk through to pick our luggage.
Coming from Africa, it was only natural that we were directed to the queue with those whose luggage needed to be checked (Indians, Mexicans, Asians - get the drift?)- just incase we had brought in grasshoppers or something just as weird.
The mexican lady before us was asked 4 times if she had carried dried meat and 4 times she denied, her facial expressions implied that a) she had no idea what the officer was talking about and b) what ever it was, she didn't have it. Three officers surrounded her case and begun to ransack it and all they came up with was what looked like tamarind (sour berries/apedur) - they let her go.
Knowing that I hadn't carried any weird stuff, I said I didn't have anything to declare except my spices - Royco, curry, bla bla. The machine spotted something in my suitcase and the officer was all over me.
'Mom, what do you have in this suit case?"
" urr clothes, shoes ...",
"Mom, I'm going to have to check this case", meanwhile I couldn't for the life of me recall putting in anything out of the ordinary. He finally finds the "things" and asked, what are these? and I said "Paper bead necklaces"
Eh eh! life can be complicated!
The weather is great! I can’t imagine facing obscene summer temperatures with 2 kids who are adjusting to a new environment.
Mich is into his second week of school, yes, we hit the ground running, but so far so good. He is super excited to be here, he thinks Burger King and Mc Donald’s dropped from heaven (we’ve got to eat healthy my boy, remember we are back to the land of big words like calories and stuff).
I’m now a pro on “outside countries”! - everything seems mundane already, maybe because I spend my days applying for jobs. There is no maalo, although Mich cracked me up the other day when I found him staring at a huge furry cat sitting at a neighbors front door. He was clearly calculating which part would be safest to hold, so he could carry it away. To check the situation, I asked him what he was doing, he was so glad to see me,
he said “mummy please help me carry this cat home”,
I said “Mich, this cat probably belongs to these neighbors and I don’t think they would be pleased to find it gone”
he said “It’s a free cat, I asked all the people here if it belonged to them and they said no, so I can take it”.
I was tempted to burst out laughing but with the serious look on his face, it was clearly no laughing matter. We had a brief talk about animals and he seemed satisfied but only temporarily. The boy is into pets big time.
That’s about all for now, I’m still scatter brained at the moment, settling in a new country is major. There is a lot of information to read and keep abreast with but I will get going soon.
Jun 21, 2011
I'm all grown up now
There will always be prettier girls, with firmer abs, whiter teeth, longer hair, bigger busts and perfect body shapes. There will always be more intelligent human beings with out- of- this -world ideas. They will sing better, be more confident, be “the best friend” and do “the job” with excellence and that’s just fine.
But, NO ONE can be me better than me.
As I hug the shore of 35 I reflect on who I’ve become.
I look into the mirror and I see a woman, a grown woman, a wife, a mother, a mentor, a friend. I look again and the tell tale signs are everywhere - I have been around for some time. According to research everything goes downhill from here on; cells don’t replace as fast and I’m sorta slowing down. Can I deal with that and accept it gracefully?
A part of me goes into panic mode, alarms bells set off in my head, question marks circling my mind like eager children singing “a ring a ring of roses” .
What have I done with my life?
I look through lenses of this world, this culture, this society and quite frankly I don’t measure up. I haven’t hit that career mark. I don’t possess the fancy car or live in a house that I call my own. My son is not enrolled in “the school” neither does he possess toys of the latest cartoon character.
When I blink and look again with Jesus lens, my fears are calmed, I’m confident and secure because all I see is love, and then I feel like a little girl – “I’ll always be a little girl in Father's eyes”
In God’s hands I can BE, I can DO
In Him there are no time limits, Sarah; Abraham’s wife can tell you all about that.
In Him I’m bigger and better, so if I have 2 days, or 2 decades left, in Christ I’m maximized.
I know I won’t leave this world alive, so I want to make it count and it can only count in Christ.
My true satisfaction is in God, in being the best me that God intended.
I will dance the funky chicken, watch cartoons, laugh with abandon, give tighter hugs, love my body and look after it better, turn the music loud, get in touch with the madness within. For in doing this I will be praising my creator. Life is not about me, it’s about Him and I’m only here for Him and His purposes. So if my plans for me are not fulfilled its fine, what counts is His plans for me being accomplished.
Life is a gift.
I want to give it through a smile, a touch, a prayer; to live in the moment, to celebrate friendships, to use all my gifts and talents.
I like the confidence that I’ve adorned with the years, I’m no longer naïve, and I know my strengths and weaknesses. I know what I can do and choose to focus on that, for my shortcomings, well, I pray for grace to accept them and wisdom to know the difference.
Hello world, here I come.
Now let’s do this!!!
But, NO ONE can be me better than me.
As I hug the shore of 35 I reflect on who I’ve become.
I look into the mirror and I see a woman, a grown woman, a wife, a mother, a mentor, a friend. I look again and the tell tale signs are everywhere - I have been around for some time. According to research everything goes downhill from here on; cells don’t replace as fast and I’m sorta slowing down. Can I deal with that and accept it gracefully?
A part of me goes into panic mode, alarms bells set off in my head, question marks circling my mind like eager children singing “a ring a ring of roses” .
What have I done with my life?
I look through lenses of this world, this culture, this society and quite frankly I don’t measure up. I haven’t hit that career mark. I don’t possess the fancy car or live in a house that I call my own. My son is not enrolled in “the school” neither does he possess toys of the latest cartoon character.
When I blink and look again with Jesus lens, my fears are calmed, I’m confident and secure because all I see is love, and then I feel like a little girl – “I’ll always be a little girl in Father's eyes”
In God’s hands I can BE, I can DO
In Him there are no time limits, Sarah; Abraham’s wife can tell you all about that.
In Him I’m bigger and better, so if I have 2 days, or 2 decades left, in Christ I’m maximized.
I know I won’t leave this world alive, so I want to make it count and it can only count in Christ.
My true satisfaction is in God, in being the best me that God intended.
I will dance the funky chicken, watch cartoons, laugh with abandon, give tighter hugs, love my body and look after it better, turn the music loud, get in touch with the madness within. For in doing this I will be praising my creator. Life is not about me, it’s about Him and I’m only here for Him and His purposes. So if my plans for me are not fulfilled its fine, what counts is His plans for me being accomplished.
Life is a gift.
I want to give it through a smile, a touch, a prayer; to live in the moment, to celebrate friendships, to use all my gifts and talents.
I like the confidence that I’ve adorned with the years, I’m no longer naïve, and I know my strengths and weaknesses. I know what I can do and choose to focus on that, for my shortcomings, well, I pray for grace to accept them and wisdom to know the difference.
Hello world, here I come.
Now let’s do this!!!
Jun 2, 2011
My two cents on this Tenth Anniversary
Time flies when you’re having fun!
1997-1999. 2 awesome years of waiting on the mail man, secretly praying that when I checked the mail book at the KPC reception I would see my name or that the Maria would say “Hi Mary, you’ve got mail”.
1999-2000. A brilliant mind invented Internet and my troubles matured to Eudora, inventing a yahoo email address and typing a message finger by slow finger like I was bursting bubbles with each key; Finding an internet café or tracking down Koma at the MUK computer lab and then queuing for the one PC that everyone wanted to use. Oh! How my heart would sink when I saw “No unread messages”.
So the virtual relationship lasted 3 years. In the 4th year we wed. I said my vows eagerly – I was marrying my best friend. We enjoyed 2 years of blissful companion ship before Mich showed up, then life changed. There was a lot more on my plate – a baby who depended on me, a husband who felt threatened by this little bundle of “selfishness”; church ministry took a back sit, keeping friendships and a career became immense hard work . A whole new world!
My waist line got erased and kilos crept on with relatives and friends. With all the exhaustion and frustration came misunderstandings, arguments and stress. Do we still love each other? Are we growing apart? Was this love thing for real? The commitment to talking things through, facing the nasty things about one’s self, owning up for mistakes, understanding that we are both not perfect and struggling to keep Jesus in the picture helps us through the rough patches.
7 years later Amani made her grand entry.
Family comes first; working after hours is not encouraged. Ask questions, read between the lines. Spend time together, you’ll argue more, rub each other the wrong way more but in the process you’ll understand each other better.
Never underestimate backgrounds, childhood experiences and family traditions. For a while I thought Sam came from the craziest family ever and he thought my family had lost it. It was as though we were the only two sane survivors from either side but we didn’t totally escape. Just like a person who passes through smoke comes away with a whiff, we each had our family scents. One quick example; My dad always bought groceries, he came home with chicken, bread, sugar, snacks, bananas e.t.c No, he was not given a shopping list and no, it was not expected of him, but each time we were all pleasantly surprised. On the other hand Sam’s mom did all the shopping without any exceptions. So you can imagine my chaos and speechlessnessssssss when he would come home empty handed after passing a supermarket. Expectations, assumptions, very key. The more time I spent with his family the more I understood the “whys” and the “where for’s” and he likewise, but I advise that you spend the time in small doses, an over doze in a short period can be fatal.
Our roles have been defined along the way. He is disciplined with money, so he handles the family finances. I love to eat so the kitchen is my territory.
We celebrate each other’s victories; Job promotions, recognitions, opportunities, successes. We have had the opportunity to suffer loss too. When Sam lost his job a few years ago it was a crisis. He needed encouragement, reassurance and space. I never saw him more vulnerable and partly I didn’t understand it, so at times I wasn’t sure how to handle him, so I took him to The Cross and prayed that some guy would reach out to him so they could speak the same language. A year or two before that I lost two handsome little boys and devastated can hardly describe my state at the time. Sam couldn’t quite fill the void or soothe the hurt so I run to The Cross. Along the way we have realized that he can’t be everything to me and neither can I to him. Jesus has continued to be our corner stone and then out of the blue a friend calls and they are a breath of fresh air, a just-in-time blessing because they understand the situation so well and can finish our sentences.
Do we get attracted to other people? Of course! It’s what you do with it that makes all the difference. Intimacy? It can be a trick especially after kids – exhaustion, too many demands from every corner, monotony, life!!! But like the marriage, you work at it.
10 years on, the love continues to marinate.
Because He lives we can handle tomorrow.
1997-1999. 2 awesome years of waiting on the mail man, secretly praying that when I checked the mail book at the KPC reception I would see my name or that the Maria would say “Hi Mary, you’ve got mail”.
1999-2000. A brilliant mind invented Internet and my troubles matured to Eudora, inventing a yahoo email address and typing a message finger by slow finger like I was bursting bubbles with each key; Finding an internet café or tracking down Koma at the MUK computer lab and then queuing for the one PC that everyone wanted to use. Oh! How my heart would sink when I saw “No unread messages”.
So the virtual relationship lasted 3 years. In the 4th year we wed. I said my vows eagerly – I was marrying my best friend. We enjoyed 2 years of blissful companion ship before Mich showed up, then life changed. There was a lot more on my plate – a baby who depended on me, a husband who felt threatened by this little bundle of “selfishness”; church ministry took a back sit, keeping friendships and a career became immense hard work . A whole new world!
My waist line got erased and kilos crept on with relatives and friends. With all the exhaustion and frustration came misunderstandings, arguments and stress. Do we still love each other? Are we growing apart? Was this love thing for real? The commitment to talking things through, facing the nasty things about one’s self, owning up for mistakes, understanding that we are both not perfect and struggling to keep Jesus in the picture helps us through the rough patches.
7 years later Amani made her grand entry.
Family comes first; working after hours is not encouraged. Ask questions, read between the lines. Spend time together, you’ll argue more, rub each other the wrong way more but in the process you’ll understand each other better.
Never underestimate backgrounds, childhood experiences and family traditions. For a while I thought Sam came from the craziest family ever and he thought my family had lost it. It was as though we were the only two sane survivors from either side but we didn’t totally escape. Just like a person who passes through smoke comes away with a whiff, we each had our family scents. One quick example; My dad always bought groceries, he came home with chicken, bread, sugar, snacks, bananas e.t.c No, he was not given a shopping list and no, it was not expected of him, but each time we were all pleasantly surprised. On the other hand Sam’s mom did all the shopping without any exceptions. So you can imagine my chaos and speechlessnessssssss when he would come home empty handed after passing a supermarket. Expectations, assumptions, very key. The more time I spent with his family the more I understood the “whys” and the “where for’s” and he likewise, but I advise that you spend the time in small doses, an over doze in a short period can be fatal.
Our roles have been defined along the way. He is disciplined with money, so he handles the family finances. I love to eat so the kitchen is my territory.
We celebrate each other’s victories; Job promotions, recognitions, opportunities, successes. We have had the opportunity to suffer loss too. When Sam lost his job a few years ago it was a crisis. He needed encouragement, reassurance and space. I never saw him more vulnerable and partly I didn’t understand it, so at times I wasn’t sure how to handle him, so I took him to The Cross and prayed that some guy would reach out to him so they could speak the same language. A year or two before that I lost two handsome little boys and devastated can hardly describe my state at the time. Sam couldn’t quite fill the void or soothe the hurt so I run to The Cross. Along the way we have realized that he can’t be everything to me and neither can I to him. Jesus has continued to be our corner stone and then out of the blue a friend calls and they are a breath of fresh air, a just-in-time blessing because they understand the situation so well and can finish our sentences.
Do we get attracted to other people? Of course! It’s what you do with it that makes all the difference. Intimacy? It can be a trick especially after kids – exhaustion, too many demands from every corner, monotony, life!!! But like the marriage, you work at it.
10 years on, the love continues to marinate.
Because He lives we can handle tomorrow.
May 16, 2011
A letter to Father
This night I can barely sleep, got heavy thoughts weighing on my mind.
I lost a friend, a brother.
Even though I seldom saw him, his demise leaves me wrecked.
Your ways are not our ways; your thoughts are not our thoughts. You know the end from the beginning and nothing takes you by surprise. You watched it unfold, every second, every minute, every … Tick-Tock!
So what can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart oh God completely to you. I bow in humble reverence, prostrate in awe, and thank you for the life Paul Kim lived and the fresh budding life you replace his with in little Kisha.
You are an amazing God completely; I know you are watching over Olivia.
Thanks for the reminder that my life is not my own.
Love you Jesus
Teary eyed and fearfully yours,
Mary
I lost a friend, a brother.
Even though I seldom saw him, his demise leaves me wrecked.
Your ways are not our ways; your thoughts are not our thoughts. You know the end from the beginning and nothing takes you by surprise. You watched it unfold, every second, every minute, every … Tick-Tock!
So what can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart oh God completely to you. I bow in humble reverence, prostrate in awe, and thank you for the life Paul Kim lived and the fresh budding life you replace his with in little Kisha.
You are an amazing God completely; I know you are watching over Olivia.
Thanks for the reminder that my life is not my own.
Love you Jesus
Teary eyed and fearfully yours,
Mary
Apr 16, 2011
HAPPY EASTER
Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live
There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
Easter is my favorite Christian festival. It is the reason I live today. Christ’s mind boggling love and obedience to His father brings me to my knees in awe and adoration. The cross is explosive, it’s potent, it’s life changing. The blood that Jesus shed changed the course of history and changes our lives to date. It hasn’t caked, it hasn’t ebbed, it is fresh, warm and throbbing with love.
When I think about the cross and its power, my insides tremble and I cry in reverence, not so much because Jesus felt pain but because of what His death means; The power of life that emerged from His death, The Life that we live because He died.
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand
There is joy, an incomprehensible peace, a wonderful confidence that I live in. It is not tied to circumstances around me - whether in pain and sorrow, or happiness, there is that deeply seated peace in my gut. That even on the road marked with suffering, even when there is pain in the offering, I can still whisper “Blessed Be Your Name”.
“Friends” deserted me, I have been insincere, the church has failed me (I can’t depend on an institution), I have been disappointed to know Christians have taken bribes. I have seen marriages fall apart and I hurt, I hurt so bad, but for some reason beyond me, I’m not shaken, I know everything in the world is fleeting BUT GOD! He is my fallback position no matter what.
On Christ the Solid rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground is sinking sand
No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From a life’s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Could ever pluck me from His hand
Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I stand
And as He stands in victory
Sins curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ
Whatever burden you carry
Whatever dream is in your heart, whatever vision is in your mind
Bring it to the cross, LAY IT DOWN
Rest a while.
Look around and pick up the parcel inscribed with your name. There is a parcel with your name, you might need to stay longer, look a little harder but don’t be frantic. Take your time, sometimes is not about picking your parcel but about the time you spend there. God wants to love on you, run His fingers through your hair, give you a bear hug, caress you under the chin, and raise your chin up so He can look into your eyes.
Even if there is no parcel, He wants you to be okay with it. To be confident in His love, that you know Him enough to believe He has a good reason, He is working it out, He didn’t forget.
Dream without Restraint
Pray without Restraint
Love without Restraint
Ask without Restraint
If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Romans 8:31
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37- 38
Happy Easter!!!
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live
There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
Easter is my favorite Christian festival. It is the reason I live today. Christ’s mind boggling love and obedience to His father brings me to my knees in awe and adoration. The cross is explosive, it’s potent, it’s life changing. The blood that Jesus shed changed the course of history and changes our lives to date. It hasn’t caked, it hasn’t ebbed, it is fresh, warm and throbbing with love.
When I think about the cross and its power, my insides tremble and I cry in reverence, not so much because Jesus felt pain but because of what His death means; The power of life that emerged from His death, The Life that we live because He died.
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand
There is joy, an incomprehensible peace, a wonderful confidence that I live in. It is not tied to circumstances around me - whether in pain and sorrow, or happiness, there is that deeply seated peace in my gut. That even on the road marked with suffering, even when there is pain in the offering, I can still whisper “Blessed Be Your Name”.
“Friends” deserted me, I have been insincere, the church has failed me (I can’t depend on an institution), I have been disappointed to know Christians have taken bribes. I have seen marriages fall apart and I hurt, I hurt so bad, but for some reason beyond me, I’m not shaken, I know everything in the world is fleeting BUT GOD! He is my fallback position no matter what.
On Christ the Solid rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground is sinking sand
No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From a life’s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Could ever pluck me from His hand
Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I stand
And as He stands in victory
Sins curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ
Whatever burden you carry
Whatever dream is in your heart, whatever vision is in your mind
Bring it to the cross, LAY IT DOWN
Rest a while.
Look around and pick up the parcel inscribed with your name. There is a parcel with your name, you might need to stay longer, look a little harder but don’t be frantic. Take your time, sometimes is not about picking your parcel but about the time you spend there. God wants to love on you, run His fingers through your hair, give you a bear hug, caress you under the chin, and raise your chin up so He can look into your eyes.
Even if there is no parcel, He wants you to be okay with it. To be confident in His love, that you know Him enough to believe He has a good reason, He is working it out, He didn’t forget.
Dream without Restraint
Pray without Restraint
Love without Restraint
Ask without Restraint
If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Romans 8:31
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37- 38
Happy Easter!!!
Apr 1, 2011
Arrested
I just figured out how people get caught by fashion police. I can’t vouch for every single one because some people just have bad fashion sense, they can’t help it. But some others, some others get caught on the wrong footing and others like me have just lost their oomph. I have overly rubbed marriage and babies in the dirt but please allow me to do it one more time. I see red flags going off. No! Am not bad mouthing marriage, it’s the awesomesstest institution ever but then I’m not writing to convince you either way. I’m just saying that things change, you’ve got to put in an extra effort to keep yourself priority otherwise things slip away, slip down, slip around – the works. Ask Paul.
In 1 Corinthians 7: 28 he says “All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible”.
In verse 32 he says "I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I'm trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions".
Now that I have laid a good foundation for my case, I can tell you what happened. Sam was involved in organizing an important office function – stress is an understatement but he pulled it off praise God! Kati as his mukyala I attended to morale boost, support, you get the gist. But this mama forgot that for such events you’ve got to look spiffy. Back in the day it was second nature – lip gloss, powder, mascara extra extra, now, I was just thinking of being there and not so much to look like a million bucks. I forgot that these functions are infested with paparazzi. I stepped in the room and I was immediately blinded by the flashes. Oh my! What are they going to do with those pictures? I hope I don’t end up on that fashion police page, how shall I explain the circumstances?
If they put my unpowdered face or my jeans and jacket frame in any public journal, I will have to follow it up with a disclaimer or just remain in my cocoon aka my house.
Have a lovely weekend
PS: Ladies this is no excuse to let yourself go, I am just saying.
In 1 Corinthians 7: 28 he says “All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible”.
In verse 32 he says "I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I'm trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions".
Now that I have laid a good foundation for my case, I can tell you what happened. Sam was involved in organizing an important office function – stress is an understatement but he pulled it off praise God! Kati as his mukyala I attended to morale boost, support, you get the gist. But this mama forgot that for such events you’ve got to look spiffy. Back in the day it was second nature – lip gloss, powder, mascara extra extra, now, I was just thinking of being there and not so much to look like a million bucks. I forgot that these functions are infested with paparazzi. I stepped in the room and I was immediately blinded by the flashes. Oh my! What are they going to do with those pictures? I hope I don’t end up on that fashion police page, how shall I explain the circumstances?
If they put my unpowdered face or my jeans and jacket frame in any public journal, I will have to follow it up with a disclaimer or just remain in my cocoon aka my house.
Have a lovely weekend
PS: Ladies this is no excuse to let yourself go, I am just saying.
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