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Showing posts from 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I woke up that cold November morning in 2006, made a few additions to my luggage and started my journey to the Grey hound bus station – I was going to celebrate my first Thanksgiving with some friends in Washington DC. In the Thanksgiving tradition, families gather at a parent or older relative’s home to share in a sumptuous meal. The bus station was crammed and busier than an ant colony. Ticket queues were so long and the lines leading up to the gates where crisscrossed, it was hard to tell them apart. The Philadelphia highways were clogged for miles, somewhat like Kampala on a rainy afternoon only on a much larger scale and more organized. The journey I had planned for 10am eventually started at 1pm. Everybody was making their best effort to get home in time for the holiday. I saw a mother with several kids all under the age of seven and on their best behavior. In case anyone got wiggly, she gave them a look that made whatever was bothering them magically disappear. The Thanksgivi

Please, not tonight

When I go to bed at night I cannot sleep There are words hanging over my head Words, phrases, statements, topics, themes; Cluttering, whizzing, hooting,making lots of noise I cannot sleep It’s 2am, my family needs to sleep and so do I Words, please come back to me in the morning When I’m fresh and ready to waltz When I can give you my undivided attention Don’t hide from the rising Sun Stay a while so we can truly dance But please, not tonight

My miracle

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It's been a long journey up till this point and a longer one yet a head. Some of you may have heard about my little miracles Nziiza and Kwizera God decided they would be safer in heaven so He took them back. But on July 22, 2010 at 11:05 am, He gave Sam and I another miracle to keep for a little while. I take this moment and many others to thank God for being real good to me. He has answered countless prayers and seen me through some dark dark valleys. I look at this miracle and my heart dances wildly. Like Mary said in Luke 1:46 - "My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me— holy is his name". My boys came too soon, at 24 and 20 weeks respectively. I was later diagnosed with a weak cervix. When they got heavy, my cervix would just give way and there was no way to save them

It hurts.

Have you ever made a decision that you nearly regret? At first it seems the obvious thing to do but things go wrong and regret sets in. Why is it simply done by others and when my turn rolls around I face obstacles? I know it’s not nuclear physics, it's life, but right now, it hurts. I had Amani’s ears pierced on Saturday. I was told this was the perfect age, she would heal a lot quicker - I thought yeah! This is the thing to do. I gained the courage to pierce mine at about 22 years of age and I didn't wish I had done it sooner but I thought she would thank me for this. Took her to the salon and within a few short minutes we were done. Only problem was the guy who did the job didn’t mark the spot so the ear holes were not anyway near identical. One was much further up than the other. Now, I stand at cross roads; Should I let it pass? - this would be her special mark. She would be different:-)(I’m not sure I would be in her good books though). Should I go back immediat

Trouble in the hood

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Sam and I were enjoying a lazy Saturday afternoon; Sam was working on the computer and I was keeping Amani entertained when Mich walked in sparkle eyed. He seemed to have a brilliant idea. He said “I’m going on an adventure!” “Nice Mich, and where are you going?” “I’m going to the market” He sat down and drew a map.  Sam and I were half attentive - Mich is always talking about things that he makes up in his head. He went to his room and came back with a rack sack. “Mummy what do you pack when you’re going on a long journey?” “It depends on where you are going and for how long” I replied “Not very long, just for one day”, he said Sam and I run through a list – a rope, a torch, an umbrella, snacks… “And where would you be going?” “Out of the gate” Sam said, “Uh, I don’t think that would be a good idea” He went on working at the computer and I playing with Amani. After about 45 minutes, I noticed the house was awfully quiet. I walked out to see what Mich was up to and noticed the gate

My Einstein

The morning drive to school is interjected with intense quiz sessions, taking a cab is starting to look like an alternative. Mich has some serious abstract questions to ask, I never know what is coming at me. Monday Mich – "If you fall from a cloud what happens?" Me – "You die" Tuesday Mich– "How fast do you fall?" In my mind – How fast do you fall? What kind of question is that? You just fall. His Dad – "9.8 meters per second", then he goes on to talk about gravity and all that;- Physics lesson right there . Wednesday Mich – "Can a cricket swim?" In my mind – But of course, don’t we hear them most in the rainy season? His Dad – "No! Crickets can’t swim, they would die,they breathe through their abdomens ...". Science lesson - Check. Thursday Mich– " When you’re making a brick, how do you prevent it from sticking to the ground?" In my mind – Hmmm… but what makes you think it would stick to the gr

Did I marry too soon?

What am I doing in this mans bed? Who is this kid calling me mummy? And why is this baby suckling at my breast? -  Exposing this sacred part of my body? I want to go dancing. I want to write a new chapter in the novel of my life. I want to twirl in the free open meadows. I want to listen to the sweet tweeting of the birds and the crunching sound of leaves under my feet. I want to date again, to spend time with friends after 8pm and not feel it’s late. I want to have a snack for dinner and not have to cook a meal. I want to think about me alone. A friend invited us to a housewarming; on the card the party would run from 4pm – 7pm. I thought 7pm was late - it’s Amani’s bedtime. Sam had a good laugh, he said, “When you think 7pm is late for a party, then you know you are truly growing old”. Tut tut! I’m in trouble. There were days when 7 pm was time to bath and get ready for the paaare - which only begun to sizzle at 11pm. We organized parties, danced and laughed till the wee hours

Back on the treadmill.

A fat hamster, having lived a lazy life is placed on a tread mill by a 6 year old boy. The boy is so excited to have a hamster for a pet, he turns the wheel double fast to see how fast its little legs can peddle. The hamster runs, faster and faster – it loses breath. Its feet can’t move as fast as its mind dictates. It topples over, gets dragged, ends up with its feet in the air, still peddling as though it was on the tread mill and its eyes wide open in bewilderment. I feel like that hamster. After 3 months of sitting at home, 2 and a half of which I spent sleeping and eating and feeding Amani, I'm thrown back into this fast paced work world and I’m struggling to catch up to speed. Half my mind is at home with my little bundle. As I focus on the pile of work on my desk, my expanding chest is a constant reminder that right about now, I would have been serving my munchkin her breakfast/break/ lunch or snack. In theory I should;- -Feed her before I leave in the morning – 6:15am

Love and malice aforethought.

“Mummy, Amani’s nose and hands look so yummy, I want to eat them”. Then he spends many of her waking hours pecking and sucking on her cheeks. “Mummy, I think Amani is the most beautiful baby in the world”. “Yes Mich, I couldn’t agree more”. He will want to carry her, sit with her, dance for her and not leave her side. He reads to her, shakes her hands and brings the cutest smile to her face. He is protective of her. But when mummy says, “hush! Baby needs to sleep” all over a sudden doors get slammed, slippers are dragged, shoes are stomped, songs get louder. There is a need to raise his voice as though we are in separate rooms, even when we are at the same table. Funny thing is, she doesn’t mind. She associates the “littler” person in the house with noise, energy and games. She beams a wide smile when she hears his voice and sleeps as still as a log through all his noise. I have labored to explain “Baby needs to rest, so she is happy when she wakes. And mummy needs to rest t

She does me well

She rides a bicycle, starts a motor and pulls a few punches She steps on an imaginary accelerator She studies my face intently:- making out the C shapes at the sides of my head and the black things on the top of my head She looks me dead in the black spot of the eye, when she has had enough of a gaze, she shuts her eyes to drink it all in She knows my scent and leaps at the sound of my voice She laughs when its time to feed She coos in satisfaction Her toothless smile makes plants grow and the sun to shine in the middle of the night. My little girl Amani

No ordinary lady.

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They say to prevent puffiness and swelling in pregnancy, drink lots of water – I drunk water like my life depended on it but still managed to look extremely pumped. I know ladies who give birth on their due dates like clock work, me? it just doesn't happen. A week after my due date, am still twiddling my fingers. I read about celebrities who claim they lost baby fat by breast feeding – I’m exclusively breastfeeding, constantly hungry but can’t seem to shed off the pounds as fast. I have been told to stay away from porridge, drink lots of water, eat fruits and I will be on my way to a slimmer me. Let’s wait and see, it’s a month already and I still look fresh out of hospital. Talking about fresh out of hospital, I have met moms with 2 day old babies and their tummies are as flat as ironing boards, wonder how they do it, me? Well lets just say Mich is still convinced there is another baby in there. I have heard about the tradition of  belly wrapping , where moms wrap their waists

The art of breast feeding

I curiously scanned Amani’s mouth when she yawned, just in case I’d missed to see the teeth that magically appeared at feeding time. I could have sworn there were teeth in there somewhere – but all I saw was her cute pink toothless gums. In the first week my nipples were extremely sore, things got steadily worse when I begun to sense what felt like sand paper when she suckled. She yawned again and there it was - a pink little tongue, I wondered how that thing could do so much damage. Like the bible says, the tongue is a small part of the body but it makes great boasts – it’s tiny but my! The things it can do. Breastfeeding became complicated. I stuck with it nevertheless; this is the most expensive, nutritious food Amani could ever eat, quite apart from the fact that we need to bond, she builds antibodies, it strengthens her stomach walls and helps my uterus contract. Week one We are first timers, am trying to recall the feeding tactics and all she knows is to suck and suck she doe

Presenting Amani

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The scale tipped one fine day when Sam and I went in for an ultra sound scan. Out of the blue the radiologist blurted out “it’s a boy!” We were surprised that she took it upon herself to tell us – we hadn’t asked and we didn’t pursue it any further. Meanwhile Mich continuously prayed for a little brother. We joined the band wagon and believed with him. When this little person finally made their debut, I had the doctor and the other medical staff roaring with laughter. As soon as I heard the first sound of the baby’s cry, I was thrilled! My heart went “feregeshe”- I was all jelly inside. I said “wow, that boy has a real strong cry”, Dr. Asa then asked, “How do boys sound?” before showing baby to me and what do you know?! “IT’S A GIRL!!” A pleasant surprise! Absolutely the bestest thing that has happened to me this year. Now I must confess that I’m such a tom boy in my ways, I don’t know how to be all girly girly but I will try. Amani means strength in Runyankole/Runyoro/Rutoro (but

Still here

4am on the 14 of July (my official due date) and for some reason I can’t sleep. I kept tossing and turning and then lying very still wondering if that was a contraction. I gave up on pretending to sleep, made a cup of tea and surfed the net. The internet seems to understand me better than my doctor who needs to attend some communication classes. So, it has been 2 weeks since my cerclage was removed and the show just hasn’t begun. There have been previews (mild contractions) but no real action. I’m short of saying am anxious. So I go to see Dr. Alex and all he asks is when we should schedule the c-section. Is there any good reason I need to go under the knife just yet? He doesn’t say. I want to know if I have started dilating but no, he won’t even do a physical exam, just checks if my pressure is good and touches my belly to gauge how far down baby has come. When I try to probe him further, he smiles and gives me this look of “I know what I am about and I have done what I need to do,

UNSTITCHED

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I saw Dr. Alex on Monday. He invited me in, asked me to lie down and as I shut my eyelids tight-tight, occasionally peeping to see what was going on, ready for the worst pain of my life, he said he was done. That’s it? The stitches are out? OK! He asked me to report back in 2 weeks incase labor hadn’t kicked in. Like I said before, I was not sure what to expect. Would I go into labor the minute the stitches were removed? As soon as I walked out the door? In the car? Would we have to dash right back as soon as we got home? Well, none of the above ensued. I’m still here, walking around like before. The stomach contractions (Braxton Hicks) are on and off. For a while there I was anxious, listening and feeling for anything unusual. I have decided to relax, am certain that if real labor sets in I will know for sure. The baby is dropping steadily, I look like I swallowed the world cup ball – speaking of which, pole Ghana! You did your best but football is like that – madness! In ot

The death of a praying mantis

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Today a praying mantis died. It got into a fight with a butterfly, the butterfly over powered it and killed it. There was sadness in Mich’s heart; today will be imprinted in his memory for a long time. He found the mantis a few days ago and kept it in a tin on the shelf. He checked on it every other day and exclaimed how the little creature was growing. Just how the butterfly came into contact with the mantis is still a mystery but that is the story and we will stick to it. Mich buried the praying mantis and took the butterfly captive into his tin. This is the grave. The tomb stone is a little fragile so we can’t keep it out there but this is what is written; I will decode it for those of you … "praying mantis and Mich matis died on sunday 27th June 2010 Butterfly killed it" One is easily tempted to brush off his acts as childish, but I’m reminded to tread carefully, play along. It is an opportunity to understand him better, see his reactions to situations and gauge

Not yet

I went for my scheduled appointment last Monday ready to have the stitches removed but Dr. Alex decided against it. He said I should give it 2 more weeks. He thinks baby is still small and not quite ready to see the world. I was disappointed. I really wanted the stitches out so that I could go on my way without worrying about what would happen if labor started and they were still in. I thought I would have a better chance of a natural delivery if the baby was small plus I didn’t think I would have the baby immediately anyway. But the doctor knows better and now, I’m good with it. I prayed about it, I know God will work things out beautifully. Sitting home makes the hours tick by really slow, but it is nice to sleep in. My bags are packed and I’m looking forward to this new chapter in our lives. This period allows me time to pray over the baby, over the delivery, and life thereafter, for quick healing, for energy, for good health and so on. Mich stays a few more hours at school to

Happy Father's day

HOW? How does he become a Man Without a Man to show him how? How does he become a father Without a Father to show him how? In school? - By the intellectuals? On the streets? - By the seasoned? In the bar? - By those who see double? How? They call Him Abba Father to the Fatherless He will show you how Mjay

Been chilling

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35 weeks today, woo hoo! And what have I been upto? you may ask. Well, I have been partying: had a 3 day office retreat in the beautiful Lake Victoria Serena hotel - just off Entebbe road. Celebrated Sam's birthday and our 9th anniversary- went to the movies, then took a boat ride the next day to Buwunga and spent the day with MTN friends. Hosted family to lunch and tea at home and now am just chilling. My work contract is up, hopefully it will be renewed in the next financial year - July ..., in the mean time I will prepare for the debut of our little bundle of joy. My comfy room at Lake Victoria Serena Hotel A nice view Team building Tree house in the distance Buwunga sunset. I'm feeling good! Still have lots of energy, actually sitting home is cramping my style. I would have loved to work till the last day. I have put on quite a few pounds. Even on a healthy food, the weight piles on like I'm on a junk diet. I look forward to shedding this weight or rather it dropping

Love is serious business

It was while at a friend’s wedding recently that I was reminded of the beauty and seriousness of the vows I made to Mr. O almost 9 years ago. At 24 I was rosy eyed and love stricken, this was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. What that entailed?! – I had no clue. Even with all the counseling, the excitement of walking down the aisle and sharing house with my boy friend got the better of me. Now, almost 9 years later, sitting in the congregation and listening to Flavia saying her vows, set me nodding like a puppet on strings, like I was having a eureka moment. In marriage, not only do you become one in body, “ You become one in thoughts, dreams and aspirations ”. It’s the melting and molding of two separate individuals into one – the surrender, sacrifice and selflessness, the encouragement, rebuke and protection that make everything real and hard at times. As time inches forward, our faults and failures are magnified. You get your cute little head out of the clouds and

A day in the life of this expecting mommy

I honk the car horn, throw my head back and wait. I hear fumbling on the other side before the gate creaks and opens in a haphazard fashion. There, I see Mich, struggling to drag this heavy metal, pulling it back like a playmate resisting his tag. Tripping over his own feet in excitement , he grins as he lets the car in. I roll the car into parking position and switch off the engine. I’m exhausted! My back is on fire, my hands and feet are expanding like they are being pumped with air pressure. My facial features compete for space. My nose stretches east and west, my eyes sink under the flab of chubby eyelids as though in the game of hide and seek. My cheeks are filled up like I’m hoarding nuts on each side. Then I hear on the radio how some crazy Chinese man stormed a kindergarten and hacked 8 or 9 toddlers to death. I unlock the door and drag my legs out - one at a time. They slump to the ground and I raise my wobbly self up on their support. The weight of my tummy is unbelievable,

My world

We have come a long way and there is still a distance to travel but I give thanks to God for bringing me this far. It’s a new experience. Feels like I’m expecting for the first time. Touching my belly and feeling parts of this little person’s body is amazing. Obviously I’m doing a lot of guess work but am certain that the head is somewhere around “here”, the butt is somewhere around “here”, the knees or elbows … I can’t tell the fingers and toes apart but I feel him/her drawing circles and lines, punching and poking the trapeze, aka my stomach. Trips to the loo have stepped up to almost every 30 minutes – that can be very bothersome. My bounce is gone. I have recently acquired the duck walk for balancing purposes but I try to keep it as subtle as possible. In other news Mr. O is out of town, I miss him sorely. It’s not good for woman to be alone. When lives get intertwined, life is not the same when one party is missing. It’s in the little things: turning on the radio in the morni

Pregnancy and tradition in Kampala

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Tradition! tradition! Just like Tevye would sing in "Fiddler on the roof". I stumbled on some interesting pregnancy information over the long weekend. While Helen lived with me, she talked about a herb expecting mothers in Teso take to avoid miscarriage and to strengthen the womb. The ingredients include tree buck and millet grains; it’s pounded to powder, mixed with water and taken 3 times a day. As the pregnancy progresses to about the 8th month, the traditional birth attendant / "old woman in the village" massages the pregnant woman’s belly to make the baby face down, ready for delivery. The massage is also known to keep the baby active. The Baganda are hinged to their traditional beliefs more than any other tribe I know and Emily played a huge role in confirming my suspicions. Her advice; - a pregnant woman must bathe with cold water . It keeps the baby active, gives her energy and wades off nausea and morning sickness. The water should be kept outside overnight

YOUR BROKEN HEART MENDED MINE

Your eyes locked in a loving gaze Words were not necessary - You had been chosen Papa’s heart was breaking but you knew It had to be done. A decision soaked in Love and Mercy, Grace and Compassion, Sorrow and Pain, And Passion – a mission! Wrapped in swaddling cloth and held in the delicate but firm hands of a maiden. Though she was naïve and inexperienced you saw obedience, desire and wisdom. How did you feel dressed in human flesh? - A “made-in-your-likeness” baby? You! Perfectly God yet perfectly man. 32 years on, your purpose unfolded 12 simple men by your side, questioning, always questioning, Crowds following, some smiling, some sneering Ladies reaching for your cloak, emptying perfume jars on your feet, Eager to hear you, feed you and wash your feet with their tears. The donkey and the Palms The 12 simple men at the dinner The garden – bleeding with sorrow The betrayal The interrogation The denial The crown of thorns The flogging The wood plunks, heav

24 weeks with a stitch and what to expect

When I first became pregnant in 2004, there was one book that moms swore by. It was expensive, those with copies guarded them jealously. I was told the book had everything an expecting mom needed to know about pregnancy and the title – “ What To Expect When You're Expecting ” said it all. Although I was never able to get my hands on a copy, I visited the website regularly and I still do. What I appreciate about WTE, (apart from the detailed information on various topics) is the humor. It was easy to get a slight smile on my face on days when I was bloated, when the world has a sick smell or when I couldn't lift my head off the pillow. There is a wealth of information on this website for ladies trying to get pregnant , are pregnant , have just given birth , have a toddler - the whole nine yards. I just love it. I’m 24 weeks today! I enjoy feeling baby’s movements, I love the tap tap tap, the pokes and twirls, smooth and reassuring. Some of the kicks have been alarmingly painful

Poof!

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My word! Something is going down up in Uganda. The Bududa landslides that hit eastern Uganda early this month, were a shocker. The destruction and death unfathomable;- whole families suffocated under the mud, children left orphans, fresh widows and widowers. It all happened in the blink of an eye. When King Solomon said life is fleeting, he was spot on, these hard working groups of people woke up to death. No one saw it coming, literally. Last night, the Royal Kasubi tombs caught fire and burnt down - something like rain in the desert. My jaw dropped in shock. What is going on? Acts of God, and now acts of man, what next? I think about the tombs with nostalgia and pride because I ‘m glad I visited this historic site early last year. I saw it in all its glory; the smell of dried banana fibers, dust, coffee beans, backcloth and old wood, now replaced by the choking smell of smoke and ash -all this, turned to ash and emptiness. The relics; the spears, the king’s stuffed leopard, Bugand

A FUNK

Spinning in circles - circles - circles My stomach churns, my head expands This place I know, this place I've been Trapped in its miry, musty ways I gasp for air and freshness. This routine makes my skin crawl To escape its grip - my one desire But how? Please tell me now I’m drowning, suffocating, writhing Humiliated and exposed. Copyright © Mary Ongwen 2010

Beware the Ides of March

Caesar was warned by a seer to be on his guard against a great peril on the Ides of March. On his way to the Theatre of Pompey (where he would be assassinated) Caesar saw the seer and joked "Well, the Ides of March have come," to which the seer replied "Ay, they have come, but they are not gone." Precious memories of Julius Caesar.

Scam??

It was a Thursday afternoon, around 2:30pm. The sun had his eyes glaring down on us; faces glistened with sweat and wet shirts clang tightly to men’s backs. I was in the cool of my office, enjoying the brilliant invention of air conditioning when a boy walked in. He was a little over 4 feet, he had big round eyes - the kind that grip your heart. His faded grey shorts and what used to be a white shirt hang off his tiny frame, saved from sliping right off by a belt that was tightly locked around his waist. I promptly discontinued my duties to embrace the reason this little soul was in my office; he should have been in school. Our eyes met in a brief locking gaze before he quickly looked down and fell to his knees. I had never seen such pleading marble sized eyes before - eyes drained of all childhood eagerness and play. In the most desperate and dejected of ways, he kept his eyes fixated on the carpet and in a monotone he whispered “Sibyo tyano nyabo” I responded and asked him to speak i

It's a Baby!!

Halfway there, woohoo!!! I am feeling fantastic, energized and alive. Loving the weather! It’s been raining and the breeze is the best – anything in exchange for the crazy Jan heat. My nose has reduced in size – see what the cool breeze can do? 20 weeks doctor’s appointment ; - the major ultra sound to determine baby’s gender, its anatomy and general health, insuring that all the organs are in place and the rest of it. I had my U/S two days ago and we are having A BABY Yeeee!!!; got two hands - five fingers each, got two legs - five toes each, a throbbing heart, a good spine and lots of energy. Little person couldn’t lie still, tossing and turning and folding and …. Couldn’t gather the guts to ask for the gender … I know, my bad … but I just love mystery and surprises. When the radiologist pointed at the pelvis, I hoped that by looking intently I would figure it out on my own but I was wrong, the picture just got more cryptic. But it’s ok. If it’s a boy - that’s familiar territory, Mi

Antenatal care in Uganda - a pregnancy rat-race

I finally got a chance to vent in Uganda's leading daily. My article on antenatal care .

My little gentle man

turned 6 today. My oh my! His growing moments are forever engraved in my memory. The aches of carrying him, the ecstasy of seeing his mystic but handsome frame on the ultra sound scan. The labor pains, the awe of seeing precious life emerge from my own, the sleepless nights, his laughter and tears and now his ever so firm ideas about everything. Since his last birthday Mich has been going on and on about strange creatures, aliens, Bakugans, Ben 10, Iron man, somebody fire, flying bicycles ... the list is endless. Even though I have introduced him to the person of Jesus, whom he knows and loves, the pleasures of this world bear down on even the best of us.Some days he is amazed by David and Goliath but don't push it, his little mind craves variety and not only about this amazing God. I started a ritual that I hope I can pull off for a long time to come. I blow up balloons and decorate his room and the house while he is sleeping. He is absolutely thrilled to wake up to a colorful wor

DO YOU KNOW?

This song plays nonstop in my head today, kind of makes me sad, kind of soothes. It's got to do with where I am at in life... I think. Do you know where you're going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you Where are you going to? Do you know...? Do you get What you're hoping for When you look behind you There's no open doors What are you hoping for? Do you know...?

Feb the 14th

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It was an ordinary day, even with all the hype and excitement of cupid, dashes of red on TV, in the news papers, on the streets and on the radio. I chose to ignore the frenzy, mind myself and let the day pass. Previous wars and bewilderment as to why this particular day had to be special and raising fists against some guy called Valentine, taught me to leave the day and its celebrations alone, that’s if I wanted a semi normal day minus silent treatment and stuff. So, I went to church as usual, listened to a beautiful sermon and chatted with friends. Sam suggested we swing by his mothers place for lunch - how cool is that? - Visiting mom in law on Valentine’s Day. It was all good, had a sumptuous meal and left 3 hours later. Now, this being a Sunday like any other, I dressed as simply and comfortably as I could: sandals, buggy pair of pants and an “ok” top. I was set to chill. Sam however decided to take Mich and I for a ride. Across town, passed Muyenga, onto Ggaba road, passed Kansang

Update

Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months. I’m 18 weeks along; - 4.5 months down, 4.5 more months to go. Round about this time 2 years ago, I had the emergency delivery of Kwizera, my 3rd son. He was obviously too fragile to survive. The event is forever engraved in my memory, so each passing/growing day of this pregnancy is treasured. I’m not feeling the painful kicks I experienced with him or Nziiza, thank God! The cerclage is certainly working. My appetite is back in full swing and I seem to be growing bigger every second, don’t know what is going on. I eat healthy average size potions, drink a lot of water but there it is - I’m already being asked my due date and yet I have got a loooong way to go before we even start talking dates. Funny thing is I’m gaining a pound or 2 a week, which is normal. My feet and hands are not swelling but my nose, boy! My nose is going places. My face is puffy. I was advised to drink water which I know is good but it increases my trips to the bathro

Once upon a time...

She looked into his wrinkled face, marked with lines of pain and suffering, well worn paths of worry and stress. He was misty eyed and tired - not from the day’s events but from months and years of hardships. He leaned back, and stretched out his legs on the sofa to take a brief nap. As he closed his eyes and shifted around to find a comfortable niche - she watched. Amara couldn’t take her eyes off this man. He turned his head to the side and she could see how the years had loosened the skin around his neck, his head was a growing forest of grey hair. She folded her hands against her chest and sighed. The house was deafeningly quiet, but the coos and moos of animals tethered in the bushes blew in from the fields. She looked out into the distance, the mango tree that she and her brothers climbed as kids still stood strong. It seemed like only yesterday when they had no care in the world, when climbing trees eating mangoes and sugarcane was enough to carry them through the day. In that i

The tortured soul

I walked in through the back door and was greeted by commotion in the boy’s quarters. I heard gasps and mummers and urgent voices. Men were moving around like sheep without a shepherd, or better still shepherds without their sheep. The ladies stood huddled together in a corner, wiping tears from their eyes, while others placed hands to their cheeks like they had been glued on. Hadn’t anyone realized I was missing? The issue at hand seemed more critical than a silly little girl gone missing. So this is how it happened. One bright Sunday morning we all went to church; I was only 8 or 9 years old at the time. After mass, I got lost in the crowd and couldn’t find my siblings. I walked around for a while before I figured they had left without me. I began to panic. One lady, noticing my dilemma, walked over and asked if she could help. I told her I had been left behind and needed someone to take me home. She was a nice lady; I had seen her at church a couple of time so I trusted that she had